Tripp...but don't fall

Tripp was one of my very first AM face to face meets.  His profile wasn't exceptionally entertaining, but it made me smile, always a plus.  After some of the utterly lame-o ones I had the unfortunate luck to have browsed after receiving a wink (hey…I was a noob at that point, don't be hatin'!), his was a tall cool drink after a day in the desert. He was about 8 years my junior, but I was all right with that—I didn't fall into cougar category with a mere eight year age difference.  Half my age plus 7—that is the formula, so I was good there. (Hey—it IS a formula—go look it up for yourself!)

After a period of email exchanges, we (he) finally (finally) reached the point where a get together was scheduled.  I was a little concerned about becoming a pen pal (*gasp*…I KNOW!!), but just as I was ready to cut it off, he came through with an invite.  His brother was going to be in from out of town, staying at a hotel near our meet.  I was hoping he wasn't being presumptuous with the info…turns out he wasn't.  More on that later. Luckily, I didn't have to come up with an elaborate cover story for the spouse since he was going to be out of town for work, so the stars were quasi-aligned.

The evening of the scheduled meet, I'm more nervous that I thought I'd be.  I'd had little luck at this point with a man actually coming through—the ones who had…well, let's just say pictures can lie…a LOT and email personality doesn't always carry over to real life. <Please pause while I shudder in memory>…not that they were all frogs…some were snakes, others were dogs.  A particular one, one who shall remain un-named and rarely referred to on this blog—that one--he broke my heart, and I guess in my reaction, I returned the favor—live and learn.  So I was a little gun shy to be stepping back into the AM waters.

We pulled in at just about the same time, unbeknownst to one and other though.  So here we are…parked a couple spots removed form one and other—both hyper-focused on our phones—waiting for confirmation that the other was there.

"Are you here yet?"

"Yup…been for about 5 minutes."

"Where?"

I look up from the phone, and do a quick scan…

"Two cars to your left."

He gets out of his car and walks towards my vehicle.  I just adore, A-fucking-DORE that first look…the realization that dawns on the face (or it could just be relief—I dunno) of a man I meet…the "Well, huh.  Look what I found on the internet—not bad," and the smile that follows.  It's so….affirming…to my fragile little esteem bubble.

Heh.  Yeah…that's it.

My first thought was, "Holy shit! 6"4" is a LOT taller than I remember it being—if I kiss him goodnight, I am going to have to stand on the bumper on my SUV to do so."  And of course, this caused the mischievous grin and a small giggle. 

"What?"  Small, nervous tentative smile from him. (He was almost painfully nervous—and a little awkward…not a big turn on to me)

"Oh nothing.  I was just trying to decide if I should make a scene and stand on the bumper of my truck if I should decide to kiss you goodnight."

"If…if…if you decide?  I have no say?"

"Nope. No say what-so-ever.  Especially since I know you want to already."

I don't think he was accustomed to such directness.  I smiled at him standing there, trying to decide if I was serious or teasing him. And with that, I turn and walk into the restaurant. (Hey—it was freezing out there!)

He followed a moment later.

I won't bore you with the details.  Suffice it to say there was plenty of fun (and funny) conversation, some awkward pauses (more than I cared for), and several rounds of iced teas (non-alcoholic)…the way it was going though, I think it might have helped him to have something a little stronger.  Maybe even several somethings…I am not THAT intimidating, and since he's a foot taller and outweighed me by God only knows how much (he wasn't fat at all…I just know he weighs more than I do), he didn't have to worry.

Apparently worry he did though.  Remember how I said his brother was in town at the hotel nearby??  That was true enough.  After a while, he confessed that he told his brother what he was up to, 'just in case something happens and I turn up missing or dead." 

OMG!  Are you kidding me?!?!?!  And here I thought "I" was a noob…

I laughed…a lot.  It just struck me as hysterical…and then I sobered up pretty quickly.

"Wait…he's not…he's not here, is he??"

Huge pause…and I am thinking I am going to have to kill two men now!

"Well," he says, "…..no. But I thought it only fair to tell you."

Nice.

::: shakes head :::

I was still dumbfounded (and honestly, a tad annoyed) by this strange turn of events and suppose it was a good thing that our time was running short.  I tried to keep up the façade, but I am really awful at hiding my emotions—and he definitely noticed the shift.  The Tripp boat isn't sinking like the Titanic exactly…it's more like the SS Minnow at that point.

Chalk it up to misread mixed signals….but I just wasn't feeling it.  I wasn't disappointed exactly…but after a quick hug in the parking lot…yes, he did indeed want to kiss me, but why encourage something that was NOT going to happen…I scaled it back to nothing more than an occasional email exchange….the internet dating equivalent of, "It's not you, it's me"…

Until…